Lonely days, guys. They come in all shapes and forms. A rainy lonely day (which are really awesome for sleeping, at least in your dreams you could get with Scarlett Johansson, that counts, right? [For girls, I guess it's Fabio?]), a sunny lonely day, a lonely day surrounded by people, you name it.
When I have a lonely day it's not because I get up and I'm instantly lonely. Something happens or I do something that makes me feel that way, like I'm sure most of you do. For me it's because I over think. I start asking myself why I didn't talk to this person or why this person isn't talking to me or whatever. Let me be clear, by the way, I don't care about the latter statement, but it's the origin of why I start feeling lonely.
The interesting thing is that I like my alone time. I've never had a problem with being alone because when I'm alone I can do my favorite stuff (play guitar, writing, read, play video games) yet, sometimes the loneliness creeps in. Why? Well, here's my half-assed theory (if it can even be called that, maybe a psychologist or a pothead disproved this 50 years ago, who knows?).
We feel lonely when we start fearing that our current "lonely" state is going to be our state for the rest of our lives. At least for me, it's always got to do with my future and whether I'm going to end up alone under my bed surviving off Great Value Twinkies, like I currently am (my Saturdays are WILD!). Now, we have to realize that having such a fear is irrational, because it doesn't work like that. I mean, yeah, life's a douchebag and can cause you hell and whatnot, but it's us who choose whether we'll meet new people or not. It's us who choose whether we'll live in loneliness or solitude.
Solitude.
Let's face it, there are just days when we are alone. Whether we cross anyone's mind in those days or not, who knows. But who cares? We have solitude. We should appreciate solitude. How is solitude different from loneliness, you may ask? Well, to me, loneliness is a fear. Solitude is sort of a spiritual state of mind, something that we want. You have yourself. That's all that matters. You have your own mind to talk to and reflect upon. You have creative time on your hands and time to really see your life in the future and how you plan to build it.
Instead of slumping around, wondering why people haven't spoken to you or why you haven't met new people or why you took two chocolate chip cookies instead of one at that party, making you look like a fatass, you could use that time to find yourself and find what you want in your life. Maybe meeting new people? Finding a partner? Setting goals for yourself? Taking one chocolate chip cookie or none? You choose!
Let me put things in perspective:
Loneliness: Alone but accomplish nothing. (For example, eating a tub of ice cream while watching Marmaduke)
Solitude: Alone but accomplish stuff for yourself. (For example, setting goals for the future)
Let's change the current state of mind. Because, let's be honest, complaining that we're alone won't do anything. And I'm not saying that loneliness will never creep up. I'm saying that when it does creep up, you use it for the better. Get up, walk, sing your Nickelback or the music of your liking. If you have a hobby, do that. If you don't, find one. Loneliness is a fear, and the only way to get over it is to face it. Appreciate that you have time to be alone and be a human being. Appreciate the fact that you can appreciate it. Be alone.
Well, that's enough inspirational shit for the day! I'm off to watch Miley Cyrus' slowly decaying career! Take care and for God's sake, take just one cookie next time, no one likes a face-stuffer!
:)
-Doug
